October 10, 2008. Sitting on the back seat of the driver, reminded me of my kids. Anton, my one year old son was still sleeping on bed. And Gabriel, my eldest son was in school, he's 8.
Next to him was Ady, and Maya my only girl. These two were surprised to see me carrying travelling bags to the main door.
It breaks my heart leaving them such as young age.
I didn't know how long I was on that consciousness until I finally arrived in Cubao, fifteen minutes earlier before I met Donna who was having her breakfast at Mcdo Farmers Plaza Mall during my phone call.
After a while, I saw her walking down the bridge, looks tired and sleepy. She's working as a call center agent - night shift duty.
I allowed her to take nap on my shoulder while I was in deep thought again near the window of a bus viewing the familiar clutter sights along EDSA.
The first time we rode on the bus together was on our first date going to Batangas. And this time, I was leaving million miles away from her after eight years.
Because I want to give them a secure and better life in the future from which at that point was impossible to achieve considering both of us working.
Well, I'm not sure about that. The truth is… hard work, discipline and intelligence are no longer guarantee of success nowadays - it's more than that.
I can't blame my wife, Donna if she reaches the point of giving up after ten years of our marriage. Her tolerance is already vanishing since I can't provide her the life that she dreamed of. Perhaps, the reason she stays in our marriage is because of our angels.
Why is it? We only value the affection of our love ones when we suffer extreme loneliness during moments alone. It's really right of this saying, "absence makes your heart ponder".
The expensive price I pay as an OFW.
When I left home, she took the role of a working Mom and Dad. I don't know how she manages it all: taking care of the endless lists of households expenses with scarce budget and time, the stressful calls she get from her work and worst of all the occasional illnesses of the kids.
And this excludes the studies of two boys and a girl which from time to time requires her presence during their school activities. And no doubt, she's a real super Mom because in spite of her limited guidance, the kids were doing well in school.
Definitely she deserved all the reward she could get. Unfortunately, she doesn't have even time for herself.
While she carries all burdens day-in and day-out, her husband is only living a bachelor life abroad. Who only takes care of himself after worked. It's either watch television shows or socialize in the internet.
Well, what else should I do? It's the only routine here in Saudi Arabia.
I should be nailed on the cross of making her suffer under my shoulder.
Two years have passed and we survived the biggest challenges of distance and emotional pain, the welfare of our kids and the heavy debts on our shoulder. And now we look forward for a brighter 2012 and it's because of her sacrifice and love to her family.
A New Life
As I pay the price of loneliness and isolation, the situation became my ally as it leads to discovery of a passion. That I have no idea ever since my world began and not on the things that I mentioned earlier of happy life after worked.
A blogging journey during my spare time - that will showcase the pain, sacrifices and triumph of every OFW and their family they left behind - and ultimately to bring change to my beloved country Pilipinas.
Gusto kong pasalamatan ang PEBA 2011 Blog Entry Contest sa pagkakataon na mapasali ang aking Kalahok.
Sana'y nagustuhan niyo ang maikli kong kwento. Best of luck to all nominees. And feel free to leave a comment. Maraming Salamat!